How not to frame your goals

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Let’s take a few common goals/New Years’ resolutions:

• Lose weight
• Eat less junk food
• Exercise more
• Spend less and get out of debt
• Spend less time working and more time with family

What’s one big reason these don’t work? They’re all phrased in the NEGATIVE.

Don’t Phrase Your Goals in the Negative Phrase Your Goals in the Positive
Here are some good goal examples:

• My goal is to be a fit, toned, 180lbs
  My goal is to eat foods that make me feel good after I’ve eaten them (Ever notice that sickly feeling after pizza? Yeah you do.)
• My goal is to improve my effectiveness by focusing on one thing at a time.
• My goal is to get more work accomplished by using tools to track the amount of time I waste procrastinating online, and make the necessary corrections.
• My goal is to maintain a positive cashflow and feel good about my spending habits by sticking to my budget.

How this worked for me this week:
My weight fluxuates about 7lbs or so, like I imagine it does for just about everybody. My new-ish khaki’s shocked me on Monday when I put them on, there was no way I could wear them. I swear they’re shrinking, but that’s another story). That told me I had to be good this week because some of my dress pants and jeans are on the small side. Add some complexity: it was a week of business lunches, TechCocktail, and there was leftover Oberweis Chocolate Avalanche cake from Art’s birthday sitting in the freezer, spitting distance from my desk. I needed serious willpower to resist.

So, instead of saying to myself “I won’t eat cake, I won’t eat cake,” I let “I’m going to eat healthy, nutritious food” run through my head. Results:

• That client lunch on Tuesday at Portillo’s: Parmesean Chicken Caesar with dressing on the side (WOW was the chicken good).
• Wednesday’s Lunch: Another chicken caesar, not as good as Tuesday’s.
• Thursday dinner at John Barleycorn: YACCS (Yet Another Chicken Caesar Salad). It got old, but I rewarded myself on Friday with a piece of that cake AND a 5-alarm burger at Red Robin that night).

The proof is in the pudding, though. I just tried the khaki’s on. They’re still a little snug, but nothing like Monday. I’m going to employ a bit more of that positive reinforcement this weekend (and I seriously think they are shrinking–cold water from here on out).